Sunday, April 13, 2008

Believe in Yourself!

Josie had a friend over for a play date a few days ago and they were doing jigsaw puzzles. Her friend said her puzzle was too hard. Josie cheered her on, saying, "Just believe in yourself!"

Tony and I overheard this and tried very hard not to laugh. Kids pick up one-liners from adults and plug them into their own worlds, sometimes with comic effect. Of course, for her, it wasn't for comic effect. She wanted to encourage her friend who was having trouble with her puzzle.

Yesterday, Josie and Toby were having vegetable fried rice for dinner and Toby refused to eat the vegetables. Josie said, "Toby, be a risk-taker! Try new things!"

I have to wonder how these cliches we throw at our kids translate in their minds. Cliches like, "I'll always love you" and "You're special". We tell our kids that they're unique. And they are. Just like everybody else.

What makes these everyday cliches real is the follow-through. We show our kids every day how special they are to us and how much we love them by spending time with them, hugging and kissing them, listening to them, just being there for them.

This gets to be a bit tricky if we're not around as they grow up. We just have to keep thinking of the follow-through every day to put some meat on those cliches.

I have to believe what I'll leave behind for them - the memories, the journals, the stories - will be enough of a follow-through. I have to take Josie's advice and just believe in myself.


leighbee said...


Simone said...

Shin, I am a breast cancer survivor - 18 months. I read of your journey and I want to say: you are AWESOME. Your courage, your sense of humour, your love. Everyone who does should be proud to know you. This is your contribution. Pure grace under pressure. Hang in there, I am rooting for you...Simone.

Marge said...

Goddamn I love you, Shin!